The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
