Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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