i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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