New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
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