Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
