There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
