Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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