just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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