There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
