Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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