Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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