i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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