I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
