just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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