he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize