I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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