Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize