No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
