Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
