I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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