omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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