yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
