So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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