Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
