Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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