Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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