just come out here and I will go home with you...
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
