Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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