just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
You ever have a fart follow you around?
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize