i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
