smell my finger.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
