What a fucking waste of an outfit
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize