just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Randomize