we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
the liver wants what the liver wants
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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