Texts From Last Night

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  (415): View more from California

  WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!

  (650): View more from California

  LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!

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  (415): WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!! (650): LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops! http://tfl.nu/mj23
  Replies (4) Good night (1211) Bad night (956)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.

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  (404): Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom. http://tfl.nu/7own
  Replies (20) Good night (1006) Bad night (3077)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.

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  (402): so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either. http://tfl.nu/umcw
  Replies (13) Good night (4028) Bad night (1576)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes

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  (610): I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes http://tfl.nu/8prz
  Replies (27) Good night (4415) Bad night (818)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.

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  (859): I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze. http://tfl.nu/hayj
  Replies (17) Good night (809) Bad night (5143)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.

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  (770): It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college. http://tfl.nu/l73u
  Replies (15) Good night (5755) Bad night (756)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times

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  (978): Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times http://tfl.nu/be2v
  Replies (14) Good night (1698) Bad night (4500)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"

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  (708): did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement" http://tfl.nu/nqth
  Replies (3) Good night (1958) Bad night (1241)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.

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  (231): P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles. http://tfl.nu/wlbn
  Replies (14) Good night (2829) Bad night (1052)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?

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  (508): 81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in? http://tfl.nu/31qo
  Replies (10) Good night (1527) Bad night (597)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.

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  (617): Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present. http://tfl.nu/s10t
  Replies (4) Good night (1639) Bad night (542)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.

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  (360): I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved. http://tfl.nu/qhmk
  Replies (5) Good night (867) Bad night (671)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.

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  (402): Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans. (605): Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon. http://tfl.nu/v291
  Replies (1) Good night (872) Bad night (535)
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  (619): View more from California

  If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now

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  (619): If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now http://tfl.nu/lp2e
  Replies (4) Good night (332) Bad night (551)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?

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  (919): Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off? http://tfl.nu/ksmb
  Replies (1) Good night (804) Bad night (273)

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