I pooped in a mop bucket.
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo