i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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