Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
