I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
