i think my tv is drunk
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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