I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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