like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize