i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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