Buhtt sex?
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
