...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
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