like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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