I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Randomize
