the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
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