can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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