she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
