I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Randomize
