im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
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Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
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Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
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