Its about making memories worth repressing
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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